Why Am I So Strange?

I hate making people feel bad. I mean I suppose all decent human beings do, but I sometimes feel like I am irrational about it.
For example, I will be walking with a friend somewhere like in a store and I will get hit by some clothes rack that was sticking out too far. Then my friend will feel bad because I got hurt and he/she wasn't paying attention, and then I feel bad because they feel bad; like I should never have gotten hurt. It gets even worse depending on just how bad the friend feels and how much I judge it is not their falt.
One time one of my profs brought some treats in to class for her students to enjoy and I mistakenly ate one with nuts. I had to go to the nurse to get benadryl, but that's as far as I ever got. To this day she still brings up how she almost killed me. And even though it is kind of a joke, it is partly serious because we really want to make sure that does not happen again.
And of course, dying though I could have been, I still wanted to cry inside for eating the nuts and making my prof feel bad and dampening everyone's mood, as if I had done it on purpose. See how strange I am? I don't think that is normal!
Also I don't understand why I constantly see the need to point out when things are not normal about me, I know I am not normal and I should stop trying to prove it to myself. ha!
Ok, so there it is. To all of you reading this whom I have made feel bad by getting hurt or sick, I am sorry! I feel terrible! Please except my inner tears and let's keep being friends and move on.

I'm Coughing Again

Apparently my cough is just a cruel joke that is being plaied on me for sick and twisted reasons beyond my understanding. You remember how I told you that I woke up the morning after my cleaning fit with my nose all stuffed up and my throat all sore? And then I said I was fine that afternoon? Well that night my cough came back and the next morning was the same as before. It's just been cycling like that ever since. It's driving me bonkers! So my roomies got me tissues, cough drops and orange juice. I am kind of afraid that I might choke on the cough drops, but I will try not to think about that. The good news is that since this cough thing has happened to me on more than one occasion, I can say that it is not contagious. It only seems to enjoy obsessing over me. Lucky me, huh? O well, Finn is going to want charging soon and I should start considering actual food soon, especially since I'll have to get up anyway. Stay healthy!

Ocean Depths

Sunny surface water rippling reflected rays of light.
Shimmering shards of broken beems, warm and clear.
Currents sway gently.
This way, now that way, perhaps playful like happy dolphins.
Cooler here.
Darker here.
falling.
Falling falling down down deep through depths.
Curling coiling rithing roiling reaching seaking dragging down down down.
Down darker, deeper, arms reaching up.
Cold.
So very cold and still here, a bitter chill here.
To awake and find the salt drops still here.

They're home! They're Home They're H *Hack?*

So my roomies are back home and they came back early! yay happy! And clearly I am still alive. So yesterday I decided that I needed to clean the microwave because I like clean microwaves and ours was getting gross and I cringed whenever I went to cook things. I'm not saying my roomies are gross because when I lived in my dorm room by my self I would cringe at my own microwave when it got too dirty for me to handle. My soul just would not be happy until my microwave was squeeky clean and adorable again. I'm just funny that way. So anyway though, I decided that I needed to clean the microwave which then translated in to cleaning off the table and to some extent the counters and I started to get a bit sniffly. I guess it was the dust and what not, but then I started choking on life again and it was really annoying. If you don't know--and probably you wouldn't--I seem to get this weird cough every now and again. The worst that ever happens is that I can sometimes have uncontrolable coughing fits and have a hard time breathing or I weaze, which I guess is pretty bad, but it's never anything like bronchitis or anything else that involves hacking. Also I'm pretty sure it is nothing contagious because no one has ever picked it up from me before. So while I was watching a movie--more about that later-- my cough got pretty bad. I figured it would be ok in the morning, but this morning I felt worse and all kind of dried out and plugged up. Have you ever felt like that? But now I am better and no sniffles and I will tell you about the movie! So I watched the new Nancy Drew movie that came out a while ago. I don't really go see movies often; in fact I actually can't remember the last time I was in a theater or what it was that I saw. In any case, I only just got around to watching it, and I actually thought It was pretty cute. I was really thrown by how young Nancy and her friends sounded though. At first I was confused because I have read a few Nancy Drew books and I honestly thought she was a bit older like sixteen or so. So she starts talking and I'm like o, are they making her a bit younger? Then she starts talking about her car and I was like she honestly doesn't sound old enough to drive. They really sounded at least thirteen. But otherwise I think they did a very nice job with it. O hey and you wanna know what? Today is the first day I have been in my pjs all day this whole week! This is exciting because It makes me not feel like such a lazy girl. And now I'm off to grand adventures! tootles!

But I Probably Should Get Over It

So I am excited and nervous andterrified and cold all at the same time! Whoa, yeah. I am excited because Roomy made banana bread and I have not had this in a very lonnnnnnnnggg time. Not that people don't often make banana bread; in fact, people make it all the time but I can never have any because they always see the need to put nuts in it. I am allergic to nuts, but only the real kind; treenuts they're called. If you don't understand that, what I mean is that peanuts are actually not nuts. They're Legumes and more related to beans. That's what they tell me anyway. But either way I am not allergic to them and that makes me happy because peanut allergies kind of scare me. I'm not really sure yet why I am nervous; maybe I'm putting the wrong name to it. Terrified. I am terrified because I do not like to be alone with so much quiet. Sometimes I will just sit on my bed trying to listen as hard as I can for any unusual sounds so that I can sprint out the window or something. I'm not really sure where I'd go though--that is if I didn't break my leg first. This is why I need a big tough dog to be a better pare of eyes and ears and alert me to any possible danger, in addition to my padlocks and awesome alarm sistem when I live on my own. I especially hate having to run water because I can't hear over it so I tend to try to run it as low as I possibly can. I wish I had friends I could call or ask to stay over when this happens, but I'm always afraid people are busy and I don't want to bother them because I am a wimp and can't stay in my own house alone for long periods of time. I think probably I'd get a shepherd, or maybe a mastiff; something big so I can hide behind him and have him attack strangers. The big cat was just sitting on my bed with me--he's the male. He seems to be very sensitive to emotions and probably can tell that I am a bit freaked out. But I've got the whole weekend to myself and I intend to make the best of it! I'll probably get more freaked out though as the night grows old. No matter how many times this happens I still can't quite get over the feeling, and putting on loud happy music doesn't really help either because again, I can't hear. Well, it's winter here so I'd say it's fairly obvious why I'm cold. Toodles! wish me safety.

Relief

It is almost super cold right now! And all I really want to do is curl up in my warm slumber cocoon and listen to my book until I fall asleep. However, I have not blogged in awhile and realize that you may be going through withdrawls. Can I just say that I hate making plans that may or may not happen the next day over facebook? It's mostly the waiting for a response that makes it a bit hard though. I'm kind of in the middle of that right now actually, (hang out Friday? Saturday? Friday?) and because it's me, I won't sleep until there is a concrete plan. Since other people have lives though, they are not on facebook all the time. I'm not either, but I also don't sleep. Why can't the rest of the world be undead like me? Ok, actually I take that back. I like the fact that most other people are asleep and that there is so much quiet. But I don't think I will get any more response because of how late it is. So after this post, I guess it's safe to sleep. So I made a stressball because I have some things in my life that are bugging me and I needed something to squeeze out my frustration. Roomy found a make your own stressball thingy online and it was something I had kinda always wanted to try so she and other roomy got balloons, but they were the wrong kind so I fixed the problem. Mine is green and filled with glue. I call it Squish. My roomies have yet to try. Aside from that not much has gone on really. There are some things I may tell you about at a later time, but I think I'll try sleeping now. P.S. I have fun new pajamas with polka dots on them.

To The Most Important Meal Of The Day

Well, they say it's the most important, but I just think it's the yummiest! Yes, breakfast.I am devoting my 100th post to my love of breakfast. I realize it took me almost two years to get here, but I am here now.
So breakfast as a whole Is my favorite thing. Along with pizza, it is one of the two foods guarantied to make me happy happy smily! Eggs, bacon, toast, pancakes, waffles, I love them all! And yes, I should clarify that when I refer to breakfast here I specifically mean hot breakfast. Oddly I do not like breakfast sausage, hash browns or homefries, but I love all manner of combinations of the foods I did list.
I think--and I may have mentioned this before--that I really should have a designated breakfast for dinner night when I get my own place. Breakfast may be amazing in the morning, but it is even better during nonbreakfast meals!
Funny though, all this talk about yummy breakfast and in actuallity, I almost never eat it. Maybe that's why I love hot breakfast so much, because I don't eat it everyday. O well, here's to you breakfast! may you continue to fill our bellies with scrumptiousness!!!

A Post To Willy

That is to say, william Shakespeare. I've always enjoyed shakespeare, and because I always had the privilage of listening to his plays on tape rather than reading them like the rest of my class, I always felt like I understood better.
So recently I decided that I really should try reading more shakespeare. I'd really love to see more plays too, but Shakespeare in the park will help me out with that one. I was on a friend's blog earlier today and was inspired to make another page for the Shakespeare I will be reading over the next little while. I'm excited for this! So my page is up, go see it! And please excuse the lack of prettiness and spelling, I will be fixing those as I read and blog on. =D
And on a completely unrelated note, I really wish screen writers would stop using weather so much for affect. I mean I know it's effective, but It's snowing here and then we had sleet and a thunderstorm and I am pretty sure My stomach did an olympic not. But I am ok now ... It's just different.
TTFN! stay warm!!!

Nome?

I am overjoyed to report that my weekend plans were not canseled!!! Of course we are getting tuns more snow even as I write this, but the plans I had to cansel for today were not very exciting anyway.
Can you believe I have never had Boston cream pie? Clam chowder I would be allergic to, but Boston cream pie I have no excuses for. So the guys and I got some to split after Build A Bear when We went in to Boston. Yes, we went to Build A Bear and Running Slippers made a bear and I think I should get to be his Godmother, but we didn't discuss it. We also had really awesome mac and cheese that I am excited to finish sometime today.
So ... I definitely didn't think you could get actual non cicelian rectangle pizza from an actual pizza place, but Saturday, at the mall, we had some for lunch. It was really good, but a lot of pizza for one piece and I couldn't finish mine. I can never seem to finish a whole meal whenever I go out to eat. I try to be good though and usually take it home and eat it sometime later.
Speaking of snow,I think we don't have anywhere else to put the stuff, we've gotten so much of it. Can we ship it off to another state? Also It's becoming a hazard and my leg just isn't handeling it well. Everytime we had to walk down a flight of stairs Sunday I thought my leg was gonna break or something. ouch. I wonder if this is a record ... hm, must look up random trivia about weather.
But as far as weekends go, this was another great one for the memory books. I hope I get to have many more before too long. Cheers and stay warm!

UPDATE: I am totally Seven's godmother!